To My Mother, On Her Birthday
Teachings to Last a Lifetime
by Anna Murphy on November 21st, 2020
Happy Birthday to the Queen herself, my mother.
My mother is many things, but the first two words that come to mind are strong and sweet. One of the strongest, if not the strongest person I know, my mother also has a sweetness that runs fluid through her and pours out into each person she meets. She reminds me of the importance of being firm and gracious at the same time.
In some of the most trying times of our lives I would look to my mother and there she was, still smiling. I remember thinking to myself, “How does she do it? How does she stay so strong?” When I finally decided to ask her what her secret was, she turned to me and said, “Jesus,” because through Jesus comes strength, and more importantly, love.
One of the things I appreciate most about my mom is her relentlessness, a trait I’m proud to have inherited. When she wants something she works hard until it becomes a reality. Her grace is another quality that I’ve always admired. When I was younger, I mistook that grace as her being a pushover, but that was because I didn’t understand what it meant to have and show grace to those you meet. Now that I’m older with kids of my own, a business, and am married myself, I understand how important grace actually is. There is a strength in grace that is sometimes greater than anything else.
She taught my brothers and I so much, even through some of the worst times of my life. Her caring attitude and love for people is always something my mother has carried with her.
I appreciate her now more than ever. Looking back at everything she taught me and all of the sacrifices she made to raise my brothers and I, I am eternally grateful. I hadn’t always shown my mom the appreciation she deserved, but some things take time. After becoming a mother myself that understanding and appreciation sure came about quickly! The lessons I’ve learned from her will be with me forever, and I hope that by sharing them with you, you can find something that resonates and to carry with you through life as well.
The teachings I will always attribute to my mother are:
Not relying on your own merits, but instead allowing God to help you through it.
I would add to this and say that therapy combined with some Jesus is absolutely okay too. You heard that, Christians. LOL. Seriously. People are put in our paths for different reasons and sometimes it’s to help us with a very difficult season.
Work hard at something and never give up.
Growing up I saw my mom build businesses, own property, work a career as a nurse and still raise a family. It’s one of the reasons why I’m so ambitious, it’s like she passed down that trait more than any other.
The importance of having grace.
I truly didn’t understand this until a couple of years ago. Grace can literally free your soul from so many other emotions. Have you ever had someone show you grace when you know you didn’t deserve it? It's an amazing feeling.
It’s not what happens to you, but how you respond.
Man, this is gold. I’ve seen my mom bury her husband, her son, go through some real tough times, and act with grace through it all. Never once did I witness her complain, she instead took things like a champ. In today’s day in age where people use every excuse under the sun to not do something, she’s always pushed past her sorrows and found the light. I always thought to myself, if I saw her go through all of that and still push through, I can too.
She loves to read.
If you know my mom, you know she’s more than likely sending you email articles every other day pf spmething she read around different topics. She’s done this for years! I’m sure you’re smiling reading this right now, if you know, you know.
I don’t think I would love to read as much if it wasn’t for my mom. I remember growing up and seeing her stay up until midnight or 1AM reading books. She read her bible every morning, and at night, she read some form of personal development book. That's a habit she handed down as well. Both my brother and I love to read.
The importance of investing in yourself.
If you know my mom, you know she’s always been a person who invests in herself. From seminars and books, to retreats, and everything in between. I saw first-hand the importance of betting on yourself and knowing you’re worth it. Even when all odds are against you.
No problems, only solutions.
Mom would get upset if we complained for too long or only talked about problems and not solutions. She would make us think about how we could make something better instead of complaining about how we didn’t like something.
The importance of owning up to your crap.
Personal responsibility is hard. It’s one of the most annoying things that I’ve ever had to tackle, but the older I get, the more I realize that if I take personal responsibility for my own decisions (not someone else's) I can create my own reality.
I wish you the best of birthdays today, Mom. I love you with all of my heart and can’t wait to give you a big hug! Thank you for every lesson you taught me, both indirectly and directly. You’re a champ and my biggest hero!